Being A "Motherless Mama", but not really..

Some of you know that 13 years ago, when I was 24, I lost my mama to brain cancer. While we were “In It” It was horrible, and painful, and heart wrenching. Its a pain that I never thought I could get through..ever. A pain that I don’t want anyone to have to live through..ever. The crazy thing about grief is, you DO get through it, really..you do. But you come through the other side, with all sorts of titles depending on your relationship to the person. My sister and I were “Motherless”, my dad was now a “Widow”, my grandparents “Lost a child too young”  my aunt lost her sister, I mean the labels and titles and people effected goes on forever. It would be VERY easy to get stuck right there, and not move on, for  good reason. ( and I actually believe that A piece of us will always remain there)  Its a deep, deep, sad place to be. BUT this post is uplifting…what..you don’t think so? 😉 The reason I feel so blessed to have lived through my grief, is because, I am now included in a large number of “Motherless” mamas…who find their love and support and “Mothering” from other sources. Is that my choice, NO, its my BLESSING! truly.

My mama, my older sister and me as a baby

I look around, and I see, Women who nurture me, and support me, show me unconditional love, help me see my highest self, are my biggest cheerleaders, listen deeply when I cry, hold me when I need them to, Laugh with me, argue with me with passion and love, and deeply care what is happening in my life. So although, no one will ever fill that hole that will remain until my last breath, there is a WHOLE team of “mamas” that continue to build that ladder that helped me climb out of that hole. I DEEPLY DEEPLY LOVE YOU AND THANK YOU. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU!!