Grateful for my sadness: Truth

Happy 12*12*12!! My husband told me last night that there wont be another 12*12*12 until we are swimming in the heavens ( actually those weren’t his words.. his sounded more like “holy shit dude, did you know that we will be dead and GONE the next time this comes around”..and yes…he calls me DUDE from time to time…Love that boy) anyway..its kinda of cool right??

Moving onto what I am feeling today. I am feeling sadness and gratitude. Not because of the triple 12’s..but because it actually has HIT me…that we are leaving New York. the sadness is coming from leaving the home we came to, as eager 28 yr olds ready to start an awesome adventure. The home where, after countless years of crying over not getting pregnant…we took the leap to fertility treatments, and our precious baby boy found his way to us. The home where we became parents. The hallways we walked up and down with a gassy baby countless nights and hours. The dining room where Liam put his tooth through his lip when he was just 14 month old. The neighborhood where we watched children grow from 10 yr old boys, to 18 yr old men. The home that I never connected to UNTIL we had Liam. The friends we made. The friends we will be leaving. The gratitude that I am feeling comes from this great sadness that has just hit me…I am so grateful to feel such a deep deep connection to all of these things, that its allowing me to feel these little tugs of sad. I wondered when or IF I would feel this at all. This move feels so “light” to me, as in, I am SO excited and SO ready, and it feels SO right. So I am actually welcoming this little bit of “heavy” because it is, after all..part of the process of transition.